Going with the Flow


“Sometimes when we were stuck, we’d stop for a minute to rest, regain our strength and let the waves take us for awhile. Even when we weren’t going anywhere, it was still sailing.” -Addison on Private Practice

Yes, I’m quoting an ABC TV show but I think it is a very important point that the character makes during one of her therapy sessions. She’s in the process of trying to have a baby and after failed IVF treatments, ┬áhas opted for using a surrogate. The process seems long and daunting and her fears keep popping up every step of the way. Her instincts are telling her to take a step back, regroup, process the thoughts, feelings and emotions she is going through before making any big decisions. Addison finds comfort in the decision to stop, for now. To put the brakes on and take a deep breath.

We often fear that if we aren’t making a decision, then we are letting life pass us by but in reality, choosing to not make a decision is a decision in itself. To take a moment and let the waves of life carry you still counts as living. Sometimes the desire to make a decision can feel almost paralyzing. Elizabeth Gilbert wrote in her latest book, Committed, “The problem, simply put, is that we cannot choose everything simultaneously. So we live in danger of becoming paralyzed by indecision, terrified that every choice might be the wrong choice.”

So rather than beat ourselves up over our indecision and our fears, isn’t it a much better idea to relinquish the stress, the power, the weight of our perceived failures and just let life happen? Isn’t it better to go with the flow?